Have you ever felt like your romances are moving too fast? That you don’t experience the time suddenly slowing down when you look into that person’s eyes, or hearing the violins play when they walk towards you, like in Bollywood movies?
Well, you’re not the only one. These days dating has been reduced to the fast-paced swiping culture where we need instant gratification without giving any time for the connection to grow into something meaningful. We’re all trying to get the one-day Amazon Prime delivery of true love.
I also have to confess that there have been times dating apps made me so braindead that I just began swiping left and right to the beat of whatever song was playing in the background. If this doesn’t tell you how detached the fast-paced culture of online dating can make you feel, nothing will.
What we’re going to talk about today is the exact opposite of all this.
Introducing Simmer Dating – The new Gen-Z dating term
‘Simmer dating’ basically means taking it slow with the person that has tickled your fantasy. Since the gen-z kids are at the forefront of mental health awareness, we have realized slow and steady really does win the race of meaningful, long lasting relationships.
The Indian dating app, QuackQuack, released a survey saying that most of the gen-z kids were trying out the “simmer dating” method. This survey revealed that 47% of the gen-z dating population from tier 1, tier 2, and tier 3 cities have adopted this way of dating, and the CEO of the app stated how 4 out of 5 of the people believed that relationships that take their time to grow are more fulfilling, and last longer.
Why this seems like a smarter choice
Skip “Netflix and Chill,” here are a few reasons why I find Simmer Dating as the smarter option when it comes to finding love:
1. It promotes a deeper emotional intimacy
When you stop to get to know a person, spending quality time before it reaches the physical stage, it builds a more solid relationship. Sex is great, but when done too quickly, it can make the romance fizzle out. Building a relationship over time, with a string of tiny moments that connect each other can often be like a road map to everlasting love.
2. Removes pressures of unrealistic expectations
When in a relationship, we often end up projecting what we expect onto the other person too, and it always leads to disappointment. Whether that person can stand up to those expectations or not, is something that takes time to know. So, it is best to find out the person’s belief systems, visions, and how emotionally mature they are before you start projecting your expectations on them. When you know exactly what you’re getting into, all heartache and disappointment can be avoided. And that’s what Simmer Dating is all about.
3. You get to know yourself better
Us, Indian kids, know very little about how to date other than the fact that it will distract us from our studies. And when Bollywood movies make you believe in what you ‘should want’ instead of what you actually need, it’s hard to find genuine happiness in relationships. It takes time to figure out your own pet peeves and preferences. And taking it slow in a relationship gives you and your partner that time, where you find out not just about each other, but also a lot about yourself and how “needs.”
4. You protect your mental health
This is not the era of on-and-off relationships anymore. Dating someone who is not “right” for you can cause anxiety and depression. It can also lead to self-blame and gaslighting. When you take time out to know the other person, you are protecting yourself emotionally as well as mentally. With Simmer Dating you know the real person behind the face and the name.
5. Build a lasting connection and better communication
When you take things slow in a relationship, it gives you a chance to communicate about a lot of things, like your boundaries, preferences, cultural diversity, expectations and so much more. This also helps you resolve any conflicts with mutual understanding and respect. With this, you and your partner can build a stronger foundation for a long-lasting relationship, as it makes you better prepared for any future challenges.
This new approach of taking things slower, and being more mindful of the people you let in, can be a game changer to finding that connection, trust and understanding that you have been craving for. With Simmer Dating, you can take your time to build a steady and healthy relationship up from the ground.
After all, slow burn romances are a classic for a reason!
Also Read: Textlationship, Zombieing, Orbiting – Your guide to understanding trending Gen Z dating terms