While we all might be familiar with the hurt and anguish of being in a one-sided love affair. But what about a one-sided friendship? A healthy friendship will often leave you feeling supported, valued and cared for. However, at times friendship dynamics can change and you may start to feel that you and your friend don’t connect anymore.
Bollywood movies like Cocktail, Veere Di Wedding, Pink and Aisha highlighted several aspects of female friendships. In all such movies, we see how the female protagonists due to some circumstances had a fallout or a difference in opinion. They try to sort it out and rekindle their friendship.
However, not everyone gets a chance to do so. Have you ever noticed that sometimes when you stop making efforts, a relationship or a friendship ends? It is because it was never two-sided, it was just you, alone.
Signs of a One-Sided Friendship
“One-sided friendships break when silence outweighs the worth of words.” While scrolling through Instagram, I came across this quote and it took me back to my hurtful experiences when I had been the only one to invest in friendship.
Growing up we are conditioned to think that we must have a Best Friend and a Girl Squad. But what happens, when we move ahead with time?
There is an intense feeling of betrayal and sadness when we slowly drift apart from our friends. A fallout with a female friend has taught me more about heartbreaks than a relationship break-up ever did. You always find yourself wondering – Was it always one-sided friendship? What went wrong? How did the friendship fizzle out? Was it me or them?
There are many signs to look out for but the biggest indication that a friendship might not be right for you is when you start to feel that they subtract from your life more than they add to it.
Here are some of the tell-tale signs of a one-sided friendship:
#1. Always canceling plans:
A strong sign of indifference in friendship is if your friend cancels plans on you or ghosts you when you seek them out. A consistent lack of interest in meeting you or participating in activities with you may be strong signs of it being a one-sided friendship.
#2. Never available for you:
They are never available for you, especially when you need their presence or support. True friendship is being available for your friend if not physically, then in whatever way possible. But if your friend feels more comfortable with completely ignoring the fact that you might be needing them, then this is definitely one-sided.
#3. They don’t have time for you:
Your friend is always late in replying to your calls or messages, or at times, does not bother to respond at all, might be their way of showing that they want to maintain a distance.
#4. Inconsistency in feelings:
There might be days when your friend will behave very well with you. And some days, you don’t even know if you exist for them. One moment is BFF-energy and another moment feels as if you are just acquaintances, if you too feel that then it’s time to re-analyze your friendship with them.
Image Courtesy: Pexels
Image Courtesy: Pexels#5. Not ready to compromise:
This is a very subtle sign that we often fail to realize. Any and every relationship is about making some small compromises for each other at times. Whether it is about the place to meet, cuisine to eat, travel plans, or anything else, if they want everything their way and refuse to make some compromise to accommodate your preference – this is a friendship red flag you might be ignoring.
#6. They ignore your boundaries:
Be it any relationship, especially a friendship requires setting healthy boundaries. A true friend honors and respects them. However, in a one-sided friendship, such boundaries don’t matter to people who aren’t interested in the friendship in the first place.
How to deal with a One-Sided Friendship?
You need to understand that no matter what, not everything in life is permanent. Some bonds are bound to break, it may hurt you. But you have to come out of it and emerge as a stronger person. Moving on from one-sided friendships isn’t easy, however, there are some ways which can help you deal with it.
- Stop blaming yourself – You need to understand that a failure in a friendship, doesn’t mean that you have failed as a person. At times, circumstances are such that no matter how much effort you make, the friendship doesn’t turn out to be the way it was. Remember that friendship is a two-way street, not a one-way road.
- Have an honest conversation with your friend – There might be times that they might be going through a serious issue, due to which they aren’t able to open up in front of you and you feel left out. Asking them, or figuring out a way how you could rekindle the bonds of your friendship, might be helpful.
- Find a way to channel out your emotions – Keeping your feelings bottled up, might do more bad than any good. Try talking to a family member about what you are going through or some other friends whom you feel can help you out. Get support from people whom you can trust. You can also try writing down your thoughts to make you feel slightly better.
Remember, a real friend will always be there for you. At the end of the day, real situations expose fake people. So, pay attention and protect yourself from being hurt when you realize you are the only one putting all the effort in maintaining that friendship.
Also Read: Expert tells us 7 Rules to remember when dealing with marital conflicts
Also Read: 5 Indian bridal makeup artists you must follow on Insta for inspiration